Only another week to go
11/15 - Painfully back to studying - it took me 2 hourss to complete 30 SC's, I didn't feel like studying at all, but I forced myself to. Slept at 1:30AM
11/16 - Woke up at 8AM, but I acted like a lazy baby, instead of waking up and sitting myself down to study, I again snoozed on the bed, doing an SC on and off all the while sleeping on the bed, I dozed so much that, I got to work an hour late :"( Urgh why am I not panicking?!?!, After getting home, I hope to get on with the DS OG and get a couple of questions done there, I don't want to continue with this lame attitude anymore.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Week 6 (11/08 - 11/14) - Review - DEAD WEEK :(
I will not be grubbing this time. I am not panicking, even though I haven't completed OG so far, even though I'm not on my own schedule, even though I have tons and tons to read and do, I am not panicking. I have been in this weird zen mode since past week, which is unlike me, I mean I always panic and not study, but this time around the fear is missing and so is the study. This entire week, the 6th week is probably the worst, I haven't studied a single thing, I haven't even revised my notes or go through a few questions that I marked for revision. There I have laid it, my productivity is like a sin cos graph. This is one thing I hate about myself. The more I'm noticing this, the more I find myself practicing it.
Despite my determination during last week to not waste time again, I yet again wasted 10 whole days.
There was the piled up work, the husbands birthday, the get together to celebrate nothing, the chronic laziness, the omnipresent procrastination. I gave up. - I know, I can't afford to do that but I did give up and literally avoided study for an entire week.
Enough brooding. To summarize, this is what's happening with me over the past week -
1) The guilt is killing me, all the time I was focusing on my work I had a low humming of GMAT in the back of my mind wearing me out. I couldn't get any work done and I wasn't getting anything done on GMAT side either
2) I wasted a lot of time - Simply put, I have lost the motivation to study, I have to literally drag my ass around to study, why am I behaving this way lately, I used to like studying for GMAT early on, I think the steam is wearing off. Or may be that my study is not improving my score, well I can't say that, I have only made one GMAT prep attempt so far. I will take one this week, may be that will put me on track.
3) I feel sleepy and lethargic all the time, eating double than I used to, I catch myself going to kitchen all the more frequently whenever I sit myself to study
4) I have been slacking at work and it is taking a toll on me. I can work from anywhere I want at anytime I want, this should be a boon to a hard worker but its a bane for a procrastinator like me. I post pone my work thinking that I will do it later and the later never comes.
5) I miss the feeling of being on top of things very much, its been a year since I have had a nice sup of tea without worrying about my things to do which I never get around to doing.
Urgh, why am I acting like such a lame loser when I know that all I need to do to turn the situation around is to just start working! its as simple as that, instead I'm always introspecting and looking to other blogs for motivation, I couldn't be more stupid.
Like a pattern that repeats itself, here I go. Again. With the hopes of not loosing it. Again.
Take 3 - trying to make every minute count. For now, because I am at work, please give me the strength to see through this project God.
Despite my determination during last week to not waste time again, I yet again wasted 10 whole days.
There was the piled up work, the husbands birthday, the get together to celebrate nothing, the chronic laziness, the omnipresent procrastination. I gave up. - I know, I can't afford to do that but I did give up and literally avoided study for an entire week.
Enough brooding. To summarize, this is what's happening with me over the past week -
1) The guilt is killing me, all the time I was focusing on my work I had a low humming of GMAT in the back of my mind wearing me out. I couldn't get any work done and I wasn't getting anything done on GMAT side either
2) I wasted a lot of time - Simply put, I have lost the motivation to study, I have to literally drag my ass around to study, why am I behaving this way lately, I used to like studying for GMAT early on, I think the steam is wearing off. Or may be that my study is not improving my score, well I can't say that, I have only made one GMAT prep attempt so far. I will take one this week, may be that will put me on track.
3) I feel sleepy and lethargic all the time, eating double than I used to, I catch myself going to kitchen all the more frequently whenever I sit myself to study
4) I have been slacking at work and it is taking a toll on me. I can work from anywhere I want at anytime I want, this should be a boon to a hard worker but its a bane for a procrastinator like me. I post pone my work thinking that I will do it later and the later never comes.
5) I miss the feeling of being on top of things very much, its been a year since I have had a nice sup of tea without worrying about my things to do which I never get around to doing.
Urgh, why am I acting like such a lame loser when I know that all I need to do to turn the situation around is to just start working! its as simple as that, instead I'm always introspecting and looking to other blogs for motivation, I couldn't be more stupid.
Like a pattern that repeats itself, here I go. Again. With the hopes of not loosing it. Again.
Take 3 - trying to make every minute count. For now, because I am at work, please give me the strength to see through this project God.
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